“I’ve already chosen the name for your future baby!” my mother-in-law announced right in the middle of dinner.
I slowly looked up from my plate.
For a few seconds, I honestly thought she was joking.
It was Sunday evening. Javier and I had invited his mother, Carmen, along with his sister Lucía and her husband Andrés, over for dinner. The evening had started surprisingly peacefully. I had made roast chicken, herb potatoes, and a large salad. Javier had opened a bottle of wine, Lucía was telling us something about work, and, unusually, Carmen had not yet criticized either my cooking or the way we had decorated the apartment.
I should have known better.
Carmen put down her fork and smiled.
“Alejandro.”
I frowned.
“Excuse me?”
“Alejandro,” she repeated. “It’s a beautiful name. Elegant, strong, traditional. And it was my grandfather’s name.”
Lucía stopped eating.
Andrés immediately lowered his eyes to his plate.
Javier gave a small, nervous laugh.
“Mom, what are you talking about?”
Carmen looked at him as though the answer were obvious.
“The name of your son.”
I put down my glass.
“What son?”
“Your future son, Elena.”
She said it so casually.
As though the child already existed.
As though we had asked for her opinion.
As though the decision belonged to her.
“Carmen, we’re not even expecting a baby,” I said.
“Not yet.”
She smiled.
“But you’ve been married for six years. It’s about time you started thinking seriously about it.”
I looked at Javier.
He rubbed his forehead.
“Mom…”
“What? I’m only talking.”
Then she turned back to me.
“And if it’s a girl, I’ve thought about that too.”
This time Lucía choked back a laugh.
“Mom, did you actually make a list?”
“Of course.”
Carmen picked up her phone from beside her plate.
She opened her notes.
I stared at her in disbelief.
She really did have a list.
“For a girl, I really like Isabel. Or Clara. But Isabel would be better, because that was my aunt’s name.”
“So you’ve already chosen the name of our son and our daughter?” I asked.
“I’m giving you ideas.”
“No. You just said, ‘I’ve chosen.’”
Carmen sighed.
“Elena, don’t turn everything into an argument. I simply think it’s important to preserve family traditions.”
“Your family’s traditions.”
Her smile faded slightly.
“Javier is part of my family.”
“And I have a family too.”
“Obviously. But a child usually takes the father’s surname.”
I blinked.
I knew exactly where this conversation was going.
Apparently, so did Javier.
“Mom, stop,” he said.
But Carmen was already on a roll.
“What? I’m only saying it would make sense for the first name to have a connection to our family as well.”
I smiled.
Not because it was funny.
Because I had finally realized just how far she had taken this whole idea in her head.
“Alejandro,” I repeated.
Carmen immediately brightened.
“Yes! See? It sounds wonderful.”
I nodded slowly.
“You’re right. Excellent name.”
Her face lit up.
“I knew you’d understand eventually.”
I calmly picked up my glass of water.
“Save it for your next child.”
Absolute silence fell over the table.
Lucía bit her lip to keep from laughing.
Andrés coughed into his napkin.
Javier turned toward me, his eyes wide.
Carmen froze.
“What?”
“Since you like the name so much and you’ve already chosen it, save it for your next child.”
“Elena!”
“What? I’m just giving you an idea.”
Lucía burst out laughing.
She quickly tried to compose herself.
“Sorry…”
Carmen shot her an icy look.
Then she turned back to me.
“You think this is funny?”
“A little.”
“I’m talking about my future grandchild.”
“Exactly. Your grandchild. Not your child.”
The smile disappeared completely from Carmen’s face.
“I’ll be the grandmother.”
“And Javier and I will be the parents.”
“I never said otherwise!”
“You’ve already chosen the baby’s name, and the baby doesn’t even exist yet.”
“Because I care about your future!”
“You care so much about our future that you’ve started making decisions before we do.”
Javier put down his fork.
“Elena’s right about that, Mom.”
Carmen turned sharply toward him.
“You too?”
“This isn’t about being against you.”
“Of course it is. Ever since you two got married, every time I give my opinion, I’m immediately made out to be the villain.”
I sighed.
“Giving your opinion would be saying, ‘I really like the name Alejandro.’”
I pointed toward her phone.
“Making a list of names for children we don’t even have yet and announcing that you’ve already chosen one is something else.” Carmen crossed her arms.
“Fine. Then I won’t say anything anymore.”
Nobody replied.
She waited a few seconds.
Then added:
“But honestly, I still hope you don’t choose one of those ridiculous modern names.”
Lucía burst out laughing for the second time.
Even Javier couldn’t stop himself from smiling.
I looked at Carmen. “You lasted exactly twenty seconds.”
Andrés laughed too.
This time Carmen turned red.
“You’re all making fun of me.”
“No, Mom,” Lucía said. “But you have to admit, you walked right into that one.”
Carmen pushed her plate slightly away.
“I just wanted to pass something down from our family.”
Her tone had changed.
She genuinely sounded hurt.
I softened.
“And that, I can understand.”
She looked at me suspiciously.
“Really?”
“Yes. If Javier and I ever have a child, you can tell us about your grandfather Alejandro. You can tell us why he meant so much to you. Maybe we’ll even love the name.”
She stayed silent.
“But the decision will belong to Javier and me.” Javier nodded. “Exactly.” Carmen looked at her son.
Then at me.
Finally, she picked up her fork again.
“Fine.”
I thought the conversation was over.
Five minutes later, while I was clearing the plates, Lucía came into the kitchen to help me.
She put two glasses in the sink and whispered: “Do you want to know the worst part?” I looked at her. “There’s something worse?”
She pulled out her phone.
“Mom sent me that list three weeks ago.”
My mouth fell open.
“Three weeks ago?”
“She asked me which one I liked best.”
“And what did you say?”
Lucía smiled.
“That I preferred not to participate in my own murder.”
I started laughing.
At that exact moment, Carmen walked into the kitchen carrying an empty serving dish.
“What’s so funny?”
Lucía and I exchanged a glance. “Nothing, Mom.” Carmen placed the dish on the counter. Then she looked at me. “So… Alejandro is definitely out?”
I folded my arms.
“Carmen.”
“All right, all right.”
She raised both hands.
Then, as she walked out of the kitchen, she muttered:
“It really is a beautiful name, though.”
I shook my head, smiling.
From the living room, Javier called out:
“Mom, we can hear you!”
And for the first time that evening, even Carmen laughed.